Artificial Intelligence for the Stupid

Artificial Intelligence Artificial Intelligence Artificial Intelligence Artificial Intelligence Artificial Intelligence Artificial Intelligence Artificial Intelligence Artificial IntelligenceArtificial Intelligence Isn’t As Smart As You Think It Is

Who is more stupid? Humans or is artificial intelligence? I read a little while ago that there’s a list of 403 forbidden words used to filter search and website results. The AI program in some search engines uses this list to keep ‘bad’ words from showing up in search results and potentially offending viewers of the global cesspit that is the Internet.

I didn’t look at this list (yet) and I’m sure it’s missing entries that my father used to curse me and others at random points in his life when he was brought powdered sugar donuts that His Royal Highness didn’t deem to be fresh enough. But I digress.

Using AI to detect meaning and context in language is very difficult. With artificial intelligence you need to give it to a developer who understands computer languages. That very faulty human has to somehow figure out a way to have an algorithm understand, recognize and learn about those bits of vocabulary, usually without context, and then get it to figure out you are indeed searching for, let’s say, “feckless hairy pinatas” and not “recipes with cherries and bananas.”

It’s pretty darn complicated.

Logic, Language and Context

Let’s say you’re wildly passionate about metal fastening devices and you type in the word “screw” – you may not want to be led to a website that shall we say is chiefly concerned with advancing carnal knowledge (via credit card) and shows off heavily tattooed and physics-defying intimate body interactions. Or maybe you do. I am not here to judge. Yet.

You see human language has nothing to do with logic. Let alone artificial intelligence. Or animal intelligence. It’s about conveying an idea or information for many interesting reasons. Sometimes it’s to show dominance, display accumulated knowledge, make people laugh, or to purchase a fresh chocolate danish, and not the one that’s been dropped by the ham-fisted teenager behind the counter.

In numerous studies done by a guy named Manny in a remote fishing village, he determined that most often language is used to get another person to pay attention to you so you can fish through their pockets for valuables while they’re not looking. This sounds quite credible to me.

Have We Learned Anything?

Absolutely nothing. All we can really assume after this short rant is that I doubt that the masters of this list of forbidden words can ever teach and create algorithms that can handle the breadth, depth and ferocity of dirty words I know I have used in the past week since I stubbed my toe. Let alone the stuff that my father used to say to the tv. And me.

Terribly tired and fed up waiting for his COVID vaccination,
Dr. Philmore Blemish III

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